Rising

Forest of saguaros. Random ocotillo in bloom. The desert bursts with surprises. For three days I stayed with friends on a mountaintop above Phoenix. At night, the city below laid out like a circuit board. The mornings full of birds that buzz or laugh—birds I’ve never before laid eyes on. From the patio I scan the landscape below and study the mountains behind the mountains behind the mountains behind the mountains. Surely, if I look west, the ocean is there somewhere. If I look east, the stubble of golden corn rolling across the Iowa hillside.  In a way, I see all of that. I see past and future. I see where I’ve been and where I’m going. 

I’m still traveling and my mom continues to do well at the nursing home in Iowa. She’s had a raft of visitors. I’ve had a raft of feelings, but mostly relief. Relief for me. Relief for her. While she lived with me, I often led my mom outside to look at the moon. The moonrise in the desert was spectacular last night. I saw it with friends as we drove down into town for dinner. Maybe the moonrise in Iowa was spectacular too. I don’t really know. There’s a lot I don’t know right now as I begin this new chapter of my life. But the future feels full and bright and beautiful.  

Desert Sunday

Driving into the dessert, the heat rising, rocks bleached white as bones, wind farm propellers churning, the ocotillo, sinuous as though it's been tossed by waves, yet now standing forsaken without its sea. I'm intrigued by the landscape, but normally would not chose to visit it in July.
Worth it though if you get to bring back a granddaughter. I remember what a revelation it was when my kids were young, to get one of them alone for a time. This girl, I've never known without the context of her family. It's going to be a fascinating week. We talked about school for a lot of the drive. She had two autistic kids and an ADHD kid in her 4th grade class. She's fascinated by their abilities and disabilities. She's interested in psychology and what makes people do what they do. She says a friend's sister might be schizophrenic. When I was 10, I liked horses and still played with baby dolls.
It's going to be a fascinating week.