Thursday, January 14, 2010

Two Years, Five Months, Two Weeks & One Day Since Mr. Ex Left and We Still Have Not Divided Our Joint Assets

"I didn't hear a thing," my attorney wrote in an email a couple of days ago. "I also didn't hear back with regard to the missing attorney's fees."
Do good things really come to those who wait? Who said that anyway? I put all the divorce stuff on the back burner over the holidays. What with graduation and all, I just wanted to let it go. But now in the year TWENTY TEN, Two Thousand and Seven has a long-ago ring to it like "Once upon a time," or "In a galaxy far, far, away..."
The phrase, "Divide and conquer" keeps worming its way into my thoughts and I'm afraid I may soon be murmuring it aloud mantra-style like the ancient father-in-law Bill Hickey played in Forget Paris. "You Got It. Toyota,"was the slogan that took over his befuddled brain and my brain is definitely playing the Divide and Conquer Channel. Me in a Divide and Conquer sandwich board on the sidewalk outside Mr. Ex's office. Me with Divide and Conquer stenciled in body paint camped in the driveway at his house. Or on the church steps when he comes out of Mass. At his favorite Peet's, perhaps. I'm not crazy, mind you. Just focused.
I got my Master's Degree. Now, I'll get my half of the joint assets.


Elizabeth said...

I wish I had some magic powers or maybe even some "connections." Mexican Mafia connections, that is.

Shanna said...

I would like to volunteer for a sandwich board shift, preferably the one in front of CHURCH.

Jai said...

I want to murder him for you and run back to India. This man is a cheap, scum of the earth.