Return from Catalina

For 48 hours, I didn't talk on the phone or email or blog.

I ate a lot of fish,

 talked for hours with a friend, 

walked through a botanical garden.

I also taught a writing workshop. It would be lovely to do more of that.

TaDa!!! Announcement!!!

I am a practicing heterosexual.
Just sayin'.
Don't Ask, Don't Tell ends today. The Pentagon is now accepting applications from openly gay candidates. Which I'm in favor of. Not the Pentagon especially. But openly gay, if that's what you are. And if you're not openly gay, that's fine by me, too. I don't go around shouting about how much I love men. Well. Ok. Sometimes I do. But check out my profile. It doesn't say "heterosexual." Cuz, well.....I'm so much more than that. And what I do in that regard--none of your business. Unless you're the person I shared that merlot with last night.
By the way, here are the states where gay marriage is legal:
Massachusettes, Connecticut, D.C., New Hampshire New York, Vermont, and Iowa. And there are other states, too, where you can have a same-sex civil union or domestic partnership.
And did you know that there's a movement among heterosexual couples to support marriage equality by getting their marriage licenses in states where gay marriage is legal?
And sort of on the subject of marriage equality: I cannot get married again if I would like to continue to receive alimony from the person I put through law school and supported in so many ways for  thirty years.
But anyhow, don't forget--I'm a practicing heterosexual.

Divorce Sickness

"Love sickness" has been supported by some hard science in recent years. I'm pretty sure I emailed a copy of this article to a certain someone.

So if a person can have love sickness, how about divorce sickness?
Things aren't quite wrapped up with my divorce yet. Close. But not over. The stipulation to divide joint assets still needs to be recorded with the court. Meanwhile I have an additional attorney to deal with--the one who will handle dividing the pension funds. It took me days to open her email. You'd think I was scheduling a colonoscopy. Today there was an actual envelope from this law firm in my mail. White powder might as well have come sifting out of it.  I think I might have food poisoning, I told the man who loves me. But I'm fine, really. I opened the envelope--finally. I took a shower. Made some fresh vegetable juice.

Weary. Four years and two months since my marriage ended. I am weary and broke and just plain sick of anything that has to do with my divorce.

And I really wish lawyers were more like doctors. Doctors nowadays tell you what is going on. I can go to my dermatologist to have a cyst removed, and she's a fount of information--and after she's done telling you about cysts, she pulls handouts out of cabinet and sends you home with an information sheet. All that without even asking a question. And it doesn't cost hundreds of dollars an hour.

photo credit:
kiki.typepad.com

Sunday Pray-er or The Mantis Religiosa

The quotes below the photos are an amalgam of info from Wikipedia, the National Geographic Website, the University of Kentucky and Dave's Garden:

More commonly known as the Praying Mantis, these most recent visitors to my patio are "named for their prominent front legs, which are bent and held together at an angle that suggests the position of prayer. The scientific name Mantodea comes from the Greek words μάντις meaning a prophet, and εἶδος for form or shape.  Mantis refers to the genus mantis, to which only some praying mantids belong. Historically, the term mantid was used to refer to any member of the order because for most of the past century, only one family was recognized within the order; technically, however, the term only refers to this one family, meaning the species in the other 14 recently established families are not mantids, by definition (i.e., they are empusids, or hymenopodids, etc.), and the term "mantises" should be used when referring to the entire order." 

I'm afraid I'd have to pray for a more scientific brain before I understand all that.I'm going with the common "praying mantis,"--because I'm common. Maybe for the purposes of impressing someone, I will use the very learned sounding "Mantis Religiosa." "Stagmomantis californica" or "California Mantis" would probably be correct, too.


I spotted the green one in the picture above while pruning my hibiscus hedge. The next day while having my lunch on the patio, this one appeared.

Some of the info on the Internet says mantises change color like chameleons--which these photos seem to bear out, but other sites claim that color changes are due to molting, or that color is pre-determined and mantises choose an environment based on their color. Which doesn't really explain why we had a green mantis on the brown patio umbrella pole last fall--unless dropping into Haley's salad was a pre-meditated event.


Female mantises are reputed to engage in predatory mating behavior--but that could be a lab study anomaly due to bright lights, etc. In a more natural setting males have been observed engaging the female in a courtship dance in order to change her interest from feeding to mating. Take heed, human males. 


Other mantis trivia worth noting: "Mantises are exclusively predatory. Insects form the primary diet, but larger species have been known to prey on small scorpions,lizards, frogs, birds, snakes, fish, and even rodents."


Dear Mantises,
Please do not eat any birds or the snake. Here is your menu:

I recommend "écureuil tres jeune." They're more tender when they're small.

A female mantis lays 12 to 40 eggs every fall.I'll be on the lookout for those egg sacks so I don't disturb them. And if anyone knows how I can make the mantises big enough to devour a squirrel let me know.