Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Lining Up for Love

I've decided online dating is not for me.   This is a direct result of my trip to Greece and the experiences I've had so far with three well-known dating sites. I dated a guy and fell for him after a lot of online correspondence, reading his plays (he's a playwright), several phone conversations, dinner and a meeting for a late night glass of wine.  Then everything went wrong.  The next time I moved a little more slowly and quit after the coffee date-- loved him in cyberspace, but there was absolutely no chemistry.  Right before I was ready to meet the 3rd guy I learned of his "unusual sexual needs." Yikes.   Now I'm in the middle of corresponding with 4 other guys and if they want to meet for coffee before I leave for a writer's residency on Friday morning, I'm going to do it, just to wrap things up neatly.  This time I have no expectations.  I'm not actively looking for love anymore.  I don't want to be the pursuer.  I don't think it's possible to REALLY get to know someone online. When you finally meet, you're still starting from scratch but with the added confusion that this person seems different than he did online.
On the other hand, if anyone knows of a guy with some personal depth, a sense of history, slightly worn, and a heart not made of stone, please introduce us. In person. He would have to be willing to take things verrry slowly so we can really get to know each other.

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