Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Damn you, Paperwork. You're poo, I tell you. Poo!
How many emails does it take to buy a house? 183. This does not include the numerous emails exchanged in the house hunting process.
How many pieces of paper did I sign or initial in the process of applying for the loan and closing the deal on the house? 51.
How many pieces of documentation did I provide to my mortgage broker? 43. Pieces. Not pages. The page count is probably four times that.
How many pieces of paper did I have to sign, initial, and "read" at the escrow office yesterday? 78.
How many more pieces of paper has the escrow office emailed for me to sign and return subsequently? So far, two.
How many trips does it take to Bank of America for them to successfully complete a wire transfer? Two. They just called. While they have assured me that my down payment has "gone out," they forgot to have me sign something and need me to return tomorrow.
How many seagulls sit on your parked car in Margaritaville? One or two. Or an entire flock. It's up to the seagulls. They call the shots.