It sinks in slowly-- this thing called death. And it's different somehow, losing a writer who's left behind his books. All those words. His notes on pages of my own writing. Lists of of books to read. His own little booklet of rules and instructions that he handed out in his classes.
The memorial was a writerly comfort. Readings of tributes. Readings of Les's own work. Pictures, stories.
Death frequently carries a suitcase stuffed with regrets. I truly wished that I, with all the money I had to spare in those days, had offered to foot the bill for fixing his teeth. He was beset by health problems--especially this past year, people said. And there were people who did come to his aid.
He was tortured by insomnia, others said. Last night was the first I slept without waking several times in the night since I heard of his death. That waking a small connection to be grateful for. A space to lie in the dark and stretch out a hand.
I am thrilled to have known him.
3 comments:
I wish I had known him. I am so glad you did. I can feel your sorrow from here.
You brought tears to my eyes. I regret never signing up for one of his classes. So many people I know and love and admire loved him.
grt
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