Friday, May 8, 2009


I've been feeling rather exposed lately.  As if my heart could be plucked from my chest, put on a plate and eaten until not even the tiniest morsel remains.
"This isn't a relationship," I told the man I'm dating a week or so ago.  He looked surprised until I went on.  "It's a love affair," I said.  Making that distinction was my way of reconciling the fact that we live apart and aren't really involved at all in each other's day to day lives and that I see him about half as much as I'd like to.  This week, I'm asking myself what I want--really.  His last relationship was a weekend thing.  For 7 or 8 or I dunno how many years, he and this woman saw each other only on the weekends.  I could see that working out...if we actually saw each other on the weekends.  What if what this all comes down to is that I like him more than he likes me?

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